"Returning to Before Husband's Castration" 《回到老公自宫前》Chapter 5

 Shuntian prefecture magistrate Wang had returned home from yamen, dinner had just been served, private assistant Xing Ming came gasping for breath to report: “North...a homicide case has happened in the northern city.”

Wang Fu Yin was tired out by the day, he waved his hand saying: “Tell the coroner to investigate the cause of death tonight, and send several capable bailiffs to investigate, then inform the northern city military to be more alert of suspicious people during their night patrol, it’s not too late if I go to the yamen tomorrow.”

Under the emperor, anything that happened was not a coincidence.

Private assistant Xing Ming caught his breath a little, finally recounting everything: “A lot of people have already identified him, they say the deceased is embroidered uniform guard Chen Qianhu’s eldest son Chen dailang.”

Commoners were mole crickets and ants, influential officials were different. Lord Wang felt his head hurt, he didn’t even have time to change into his official robes, wearing his casual clothes he went to Shuntian prefecture yamen.

Chen dailang’s corpse had been discovered by someone who needed to wee.

Night had fallen with the moon concealed, the moon on April thirteenth was like a mooncake which had been bitten, the passer-by had hide behind a large willow tree by the roadside, loosening his belt, he discovered there was a person lying under the tree.

At first he had thought it was a drunk drunkard, the passer-by used his foot to kick him, “Brother, move over.”

The body was on one’s side, with a kick, it came onto its back, the neck tilting to the left, under the bright moonlight, the neck could be seen to have been severed.

The passer-by was so scared his wee went back in, he loudly called out: “Murder!”

The northern city military on hearing the news rushed over, at that moment there were three rings of people standing around the willow tree, the corpse was completely surrounded, someone recognised the deceased on the spot: “It looks like Chen dailang, he likes to play with prostitutes, there isn’t a brothel he hasn’t visited in the capital.”

“It really is ten years gone by, and still I dream of Yangzhou, why, even in the blue houses, you said I was fickle.¹”

The northern city military hurried dispelled the crowd, taking a plank they carried the body to the yamen. The city military only carried out patrols and arrested robbers, investigating cases weren’t their job.

Hearing his son had been murdered, Chen Qianhu rushed over with the embroidered uniform guards on hearing this, he didn’t trust in the investigative abilities of the yamen, he immediately kicked the yamen’s coroner and bailiffs away when they tried to stop him, snatching his son’s body back home!

The servant of Chen dailang gave a list of people that had recently interacted with Chen dailang, Chen Qianhu gave the list to his subordinates, telling them they must arrest all the suspects tonight and place them in embroidered uniform guards office, stringently question them via torture, his vowed the culprit must be caught before daybreak.

Once the Shutian prefecture magistrate rushed to the yamen, he found it looking like it had been robbed, especially where the corpses were stored, tables and chairs were broken, a complete mess.

The coroner and bailiffs who had been beaten badly complained to their superior one by one: “Chen Qianhu brought men to break in, they kicked anyone they saw, throw anything they saw.”

“We didn’t kill his son, why did he beat us up so badly? An intolerable bully!”

“The corpse has been stolen, how can we investigate? What should we do now? Please give us guidance magistrate.”

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The Shuntian prefecture magistrate was the father and mother of the capital city, but the capital was where influential officials converged, what was he as a mere third ranked literary official? There were two kinds of people who could sit in his position, one was similar to Kaifeng prefecture magistrate Bao during the Song dynasty who was strictly impartial and incorruptible, distinguishing between good and bad, no matter who you were, he even dragged the emperor’s son-in-law to the guillotine, cutting his head off.

The other kind was one which struck water right and left, a fluid character, avoiding trouble where possible, neglect if possible. The current Shuntian prefecture magistrate Wang was just character, people called him--- mudfish Wang!

Mudfish Wang, no magistrate Wang the parents of the capital very often actually acted like someone’s grandson, especially before the influential officials.

Wang Fu Yin gave a light cough, “Tonight everyone has been wronged, embroidered uniform guards took the corpse away, and went about arresting people in the crowded streets, this is actually good for our yamen.”

With such words, everyone was startled, not knowing how this mudfish Wang planned to slip away.

Wang Fu Yin shook his head saying: “This case belongs to this yamen, the embroidered uniform guards took the body, but they can’t take our case--- embroidered uniform guards only deal with imperial cases, once Chen Qianhu solves the case with his net throwing method, catch the murderer, he can only bring the murderer to this yamen for conviction and sentencing?”

Private assistant Xing Ming hurriedly stood forward in reverence like a yes-man: “This way, our yamen would solve a major case without doing anything, and be rewarded for our work, you only suffered a little beating, a case will be solved with you lying there, there’s reward to be given, where can you find such a good thing? Magistrate is wise!”

Everyone hearing this felt this mudfish Wang made sense, reaping the benefits by doing nothing, and get the reward money too, but, a constable with the surname Wu pointed at his injured head, and the scattered remnants of his injured subordinates, “Private assistant wasn’t beaten up of course you speak of it easily. They follow me through fire and water, arresting robbers, fine if they suffered some injuries from fighting hand in hand with criminals, after all this job requires a struggle, but tonight we were beaten by our own, and were bullied by the embroidered uniformed guards on our own turf, how can my brothers’ be appeased.”

He looked at the group of excited people, mudfish Wang told the private assistant Qian Gu, “All their medical fees can be expensed, issue compensation payments this month for work related injuries, go home and recuperate, there’s no need to be on night duty tonight.

There were two private assistants in the prefecture, private assistant Xing Ming was in charge of cases, private assistant Qian Gu locked after the account book.

Qiangu private assistant also stepped forward to flatter: “It’s good enough, magistrate has already done his best, do you want the embroidered uniform guards to offer you tea and apologise? Disperse, go home clean up and sleep.”

Constable Wu and the others still felt angry, but there wasn’t a way to deal with it, they could only leave with their injuries.

Mudfish Wang sighed in despair at the two private assistants, “This is a difficult position to hold, once I’m done with three years, I’ll get the Ministry of Appointments to clear the way, appoint me to a position outside the capital, I’ll become a genuine official of the people who keeps his word, and get rid of the grievances from these two years.”

Xing Ming, Qian Gu the two private secretaries looked at each other, saying in unison: “No matter where magistrate goes, we vow to follow you!” 

So called subordinates imitate their superiors' vices, magistrate Wang was as slick and sly as a mudfish, the two private assistants were two slippery eels.

After their words fell, they heard the sound of dong dong outside.

It was the injustice drum outside the yamen.

Constable Wu and the others returned to the lobby, coming forward to announce: “Northern city military and the embroidered uniform guards are going at it outside the yamen! Embroidered uniform guards want to take Wang Ya Nei to the imperial prison, Wang Ya Nei is not willing to be tied and captured, his striking the injustice drum, reporting the embroidered uniform guards for setting up a kangaroo court to murder an able and virtuous man!”

Wang Dai Xia was infamous, especially in the northern city, known to everybody, familiar to all, there weren’t many people with the surname Wang in the capital, but as soon as constable Wu said Wang Ya Nei, everyone knew he was talking about Wang Dai Xia.

Splutter, mudfish Wang laughed, “Kangaroo court is correct, but murder an able and virtuous man? Wang Ya Nei dares to call himself able and virtuous? If he is an able and virtuous person, this official is the reincarnation of magistrate Bao.”

Mudfish Wang sat in the court, private assistant Xing Ming stood to his left, private assistant Qian Gu to the right, the two of them communicated with their eyes, these words were laughable but weren’t at the same time, should they or should they not laugh?

Constable Wu with a frank personality didn’t scheme much, he anxiously said, “Magistrate, it’s chaos outside the yamen, what should we do now?”

Mudfish Wang stroked the strand of beard on his chin, “Dragon versus a snake, let them fight it out, the weather is turning warmer, everyone is heated up, coming to blows, vent it out, it’s good. Wait until they’re almost done, we can then clean up the mess.”

Their master had spoken, private assistant Xing Ming immediately agreed: “That’s right, constable Wu if you go out now to intervene, can you beat them? Or would they even respect you? The two sides are not to be trifled with, don’t rush in and be hated.”

Constable Wu hurriedly said: “What if it becomes fatal?” 

With these words, the sound of the injustice drum came to a sudden end.

Mudfish Wang was also afraid it could become fatal, at once he urged constable Wu, “Go quickly take a look, has Wang Ya Nei been beaten to death.”

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That wasn’t the case.

At that moment Wang Dai Xia who was striking the drum heard a piercing cry of a woman in the crowd: “Watch out an arrow!”

Then becoming aware of a an air piercing sound behind him, the hairs on his nape stood up, his survival instincts kicked in, Wang Dai Xia immediately crouched down holding the drum stick and clutching his head.

With a duo sound, a sharp arrow struck the middle of the injustice drum, the drum head was ruptured, it couldn’t be struck.

Wang Dai Xia looked in the direction of the female voice, under the hazy moonlight, there was a person on a mule cart a little distance away, even though he couldn’t her appearance clearly, but the white mourning cloth on her bun was very conspicuous in the dim light of night.

Then also looking at her sweet, fair and graceful figure, it must be that pretty young widow doctor Wei.

That good judge of character who compared him to King Zhuang of Chu.

Actually Wang Dai Xia knew who King Zhuang of Chu was--- even if he hasn’t eaten pork before he has seen a pig run, he had been in education for a few years, he had read the <Spring and Autumn Period annals> as stories.

At the wonton store, he deliberately pretended to be stupid, finding an excuse to move his stool closer, and to just speak to the young pretty widow a little more.

Now when everyone else was enjoying the show, she said one sentence to save him.

Wang Dai Xia thought to himself, wait for me to deal with this, I will thank her properly.

At this critical moment, while Wang Dai Xia’s heart was like a frisky monkey, mind like a cantering horse thinking about the young widow, a few more arrows came his way, Wang Dai Xia nimbly dodged, he saw a crack open in the yamen doors, someone stuck half their head out to see what was going on.

Wang Dai Xia simply pushed over the drum frame, the large round injustice drum rolled towards where the arrows came from, crushing as it rolled, the arrows were halted.

Simultaneously, Wang Dai Xia ran towards the crack in the yamen door, constable Wu hurriedly closed the door to avoid this pestilence, Wang Dai Xia threw the drum stick in his hand from some distance, it just wedged into the gap, constable Wu couldn’t close the door.

Wang Dai Xia slipped in, cupping his hand in greeting at constable Wu he smiled, “Thank you for your help, some day I’ll treat constable Wu to a drink.”

“You can’t enter! I don’t want to stir up the fire and get burned!” Constable Wu pushed Wang Dai Xia in the direction of the door, but at this moment Zhou xiaoqi who led the embroidered uniform guards kicked the doors open on horseback, bursting in!

If Wang Dai Xia hadn’t pulled constable Wu aside, at this moment constable Wu would have been kicked in the head by the horse’s hoof of Zhou xiaoqi’s flying horse!

Constable Wu and Wang Dai Xia both rolled behind the door, Zhou xiaoqi raised his whip again towards Wang Dai XIa.

He already had his grievances, now he almost lost his life under the iron hoof of the embroidered uniform guard, even a clay person had some personality, constable Wu couldn’t keep a neutral stance as ordered by his superior mudfish Wang, drawing his sword he cut the whip, bellowing in rage: “This is the court of Shuntian prefecture! Not your embroidered uniform guards territory! Brothers! Pull him down from his horse!”

Everyone rushed forward, people grabbed the reins, grabbed the legs, like ripping off a herbal plaster applied to a wound they pulled Zhou xiaoqi off.

While Zhou xiaoqi got off the horse, Wang Dai Xia once again closed the doors, puting the horizontal door plank across it.

Wang Ya Nei hiding in the yamen, the embroidered uniform guards and the northern city military lost their prey and target to protect, they immediately seized fighting.

The embroidered uniform guards were furiously hitting the door outside, wanting the yamen to hand over “Wang Ya Nei and Zhou xiaoqi”. 

The northern city military said in union “Thank you magistrate Wang for speaking out for justice, stand for justice! Return Wang Dai Xia’s innocence!”

The watching masses also heckled: “Why aren’t you fighting? Continue fighting! I haven’t seen enough!”

“Don’t be scared! Quickly fight!”

“Melon seeds, peanuts, mung bean soup!”

Various phrases went back and forth, it was extremely disturbing, seeing Wang Dai Xia had escaped to the yamen court, his life was temporarily not in danger, Wei Cai Wei let out a breath.

“A bag of melon seeds please!” Manager Chen brought a bag of melon seeds, giving half to Wei Cai Wei, cracking them between his teeth he said with keen interest: “Zeze, this is better than a large scale opera, they really were fighting.”

At this moment, the ground trembled, two groups of men on horseback arrived at the yamen almost at the same time, one of the Leaders had a white cloth wrapped around his forehead, wearing white mourning garment, a straw rope around his waist, this was embroidered uniform guard Chen Qianhu, the deceased Chen dailang’s father.

Seeing him, Wei Cai Wei squeezed open the melon seed in her hand: he is the source of the He family’s tragedy, Chen dailang was a small accomplice. 

Manager Chen grew even more excited, he didn’t notice the change in her expression, pointing to the person who headed the other group he said: “The one in the armour is Wang Qianhu, in the end they’re father and son, he can beat him to death. If other’s call for his son to be beaten and killed, he would be concerned. Chen Qianhu is squaring up to Wang Qianhu, we have another good show to watch.”

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1 Du Mu’s poem is often given as Dispelling Sorrow^↩